chi-cken. good.

What's wrong with you? What you screamin' for? Every five minutes there's somethin', a bomb or somethin'. I'm leavin'. bzzzz.

Jul 23

zirtaevans:

heathicorn:

otp: [insert ship where the guy looks at the girl like she hung the moon]

image

(via loki-of-sassgaard)


(via t3akitt3n)


oscarswildetiger:

nerdygirllove:

frxdo:

robofists-revenge:

I once went to the Renaissance Fair dressed as Marty McFly, and nobody got the joke.

That will forever be one of the most disappointing moments in my life.

This is my favorite photoset rn

I totally get this guy. A whole fair of nerds and no one got a awesome 80s pop culture reference. Shame. The faces are amazing.

This is heavy

(via kittensandscience)


I think I need to try to find god again.


Gold Diggers of 1933 (1933) dir. Mervyn LeRoy

(via everyonelikedbubbahotep)


pardonmewhileipanic:

gaining-lady-x:

feedme-seemore:

lovethyfatness:

aock2908:

lovethyfatness:

"So what’d you do today?"
"Got a lot of glitter in my bellybutton."

That is way too much. Why does her stomache split? And seriously if you publish in a public space it’s my right go express shock

Way too much glitter?! Well fuck. Pardon me while I go express shock.

That is a lot of glitter, but it seems like just the right amount. I’m not sure why anyone would be shocked by that amount of glitter—in a public space or otherwise.

There’s no such thing as “too much glitter”

I’m shocked that there’s not MORE glitter. And seriously, if you publish in a public space it’s my right to express shock
(p.s. the only people who whine about their rights to abuse others, are those who know they are wrong, pathetic, and have worthless “opinions”, and know NOTHING about rights, otherwise the would know that freedom of speech means the government cannot censure you, not that your words and their meanings will go unquestioned, or that you won’t have to face an epic clapback from pissed off people who don’t care about insecure fatphobic fucks

pardonmewhileipanic:

gaining-lady-x:

feedme-seemore:

lovethyfatness:

aock2908:

lovethyfatness:

"So what’d you do today?"

"Got a lot of glitter in my bellybutton."

That is way too much. Why does her stomache split? And seriously if you publish in a public space it’s my right go express shock

Way too much glitter?! Well fuck. Pardon me while I go express shock.

That is a lot of glitter, but it seems like just the right amount. I’m not sure why anyone would be shocked by that amount of glitter—in a public space or otherwise.

There’s no such thing as “too much glitter”

I’m shocked that there’s not MORE glitter. And seriously, if you publish in a public space it’s my right to express shock

(p.s. the only people who whine about their rights to abuse others, are those who know they are wrong, pathetic, and have worthless “opinions”, and know NOTHING about rights, otherwise the would know that freedom of speech means the government cannot censure you, not that your words and their meanings will go unquestioned, or that you won’t have to face an epic clapback from pissed off people who don’t care about insecure fatphobic fucks

(via sleepydumpling)


  • mercutio: i can see what's happening
  • benvolio: what?
  • mercutio: and they don't have a clue!
  • benvolio: stop
  • mercutio: they'll fall in love and here's the bottom line -- our trio's down to two
  • benvolio: people are dying

quixon:

thebigblackwolfe:

frantzfandom:

girilla-warfare:

the-average-gatsby:

the-average-gatsby:

how do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber

ask them to pronounce “unionized”

Holy fuck thats clever

It took me 5 minutes to get this

FUCK

Oh fuck you.

Smart people jokes be like

(via loki-of-sassgaard)


(via thefrogman)


Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw

if you’ve a ready mind.

(via mrslunalovegood)


om1tted:

more-scars-than-skin:

its weird society sees people with tattoos and modifications as being unclean and poor when in reality its so expensive to get those things in the first place and the aftercare is strenuous and daily and in reality modified people are probably the most hygienic and well off people you’ll meet

amen.

(via third-degree-burn-gorman)


callmeoutis:

i was ready to just scroll past like “haha grammar humor” but then it was weird al and i,

(via girlfriendexchangeclub)


itsmg:

Take 1
Bruce: Well aren’t you gonna unwrap it.
Jeffrey: What? [bursts out laughing] What did you say?
Bruce: Aren’t you gonna unwrap it?
Coby: He said “Aren’t you gonna unwraaap it?”
Bruce: It was a little weird delivery.
———
Take 2
Bruce: Aren’t you gonna unwrap it? [Jeffrey bursts out laughing again] Is that better? 
Jeffrey: Sorry. Oh I know you’re still rolling. You’re mining gold here.
———
Take 3
Jeffrey: This is great.
Bruce: Well unwrap it.
Jeffrey: [dissolves into giggles again]
Bruce: It was different. You wanted something different.
Jeffrey: I was trying to get used to that one you’re doing. Don’t change it up!
Coby: That was awesome.
Jeffrey: Hold on…. we should cut.  

I miss this adorable dork!

(via everyonelikedbubbahotep)


thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”
There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her."No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”
And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”

There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her.
"No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”

And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

(via kittensandscience)


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